Jesus vs Doctor Who

You can stumble across all kinds of stuff on the web. I found this on God Told Me To Tell You, which seems to have had no activity since November 2011. Made me laugh.

Jesus vs Dr Who Part 1

Jesus vs Dr Who Part 2

 

It wasn’t me!

This is another hilarious cartoon from the Jesus and Mo archives. I was going to publish this on its own for today’s entertainment, but decided to check out Jesus farting on DuckDuckGo. It turns out that “Did Jesus fart?” is a question that’s been asked lots of times.

The Urban Dictionary had this definition:

fart of jesus: Thought to have been named after the actual farts that the Lord Jesus Christ was reported to have made on many occasions. A fart having a fragrant aroma not dissimilar to that of summer berries with a hint of coriander and wood smoke.

Mmmm, smells like the fart of Jesus.

They also offered:

jebus parp: Nice smelling fart.

Wow! That’s nice. You could say it was quite the Jebus parp.

I found several offerings on YouTube. Here’s a couple: the first dealing with the immediate question, and the second considering the theological ramifications of an affirmative answer.

Of course, for parents this can be an awkward topic as this post indicates, We Don’t Use ‘Jesus’ and ‘Fart’ in the Same Sentence.

My favourite question was from the person who wanted to know whether Jesus’ farts had healing properties like curing asthma. The most popular response was that Jesus would have needed a Dutch oven to do this. I had no idea what this was, but the Urban Dictionary came to my rescue again.

dutch oven: The act of trapping a person under bed covers after releasing vile ass fumes

Dave vomited on the sheets when his wife gave him a white castle dutch oven.

No Jesus?

I’ve never been a religious person. My father was a renegade Roman Catholic. Though we never really discussed it, I think he objected to the hypocrisy. So there was no question of church or Sunday School. My brother and I were baptised Church of England—because that’s what you did back then. Nonetheless, I’d always assumed that Jesus of the Bible was a real person. As a result of my meanderings through the web on the subjects of Creationism and Intelligent Design (and the utter stupidity of these ideas[1]), I stumbled upon the notion that Jesus wasn’t actually any such thing.

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